Skip Happens Podcast - Every Boot Has a Story!

Friends vs Acquaintances: Why Most People Aren’t Really Your Friends

• Skip Clark

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SPEAKER_03:

Hello, everybody, and welcome to another edition of Skip Happens. We are off, we are running, and uh yeah, maybe some obstacles too. Tonight, you're gonna love this. Uh, I hope. But look, we're gonna talk about those almost friends. You like them, you see them, but the relationship never levels up. Talking about no blow up, no breakup, just stuck. And we want to know why. And also, the important life question if someone coughs or sneezes over your food while making it, are you still eating it? Think about that. No judgment here. We just want the truth. Miss Ray is with us. Hello.

SPEAKER_00:

Hello, hello. Hey, hey, hey, what's going on?

SPEAKER_03:

Nothing. We got a lot going on. What do you got going on?

SPEAKER_01:

Nothing much. You know, we're just surviving the snow. We're trying to get through it. My car ride home today was awful. The highways were terrible. Yeah. But so it took me a little bit longer to get home. But um yeah, it's crazy up here in central New York.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, there and you're in upstate New York. You live about maybe a half hour away from where you and I work when we're at the radio station. So yeah, you get on the highway and still there's only so much you can do. It's what we call lake effect, and you learn to live with it. You've been there all your life. I've been here all my life. It's all good.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't know. It's still I still get that disappointed, like, oh my gosh, more snow. No matter how much how much snow you get or how many times you see snow, it's still a lot of. I don't know. You kind of I get a little disappointed. I'm like, snow again. Are we serious? But yeah, a little bit north of me got got feet of snow overnight.

SPEAKER_03:

Yes. They don't count it in inches or anything like that.

SPEAKER_01:

No, so um, no, feet. This morning I was working at my other job, and this lady was calling saying, like, hey, like a swiggle got like two and a half feet. And I was like, excuse me, say that one more time. And she's like, Yeah, I said two and a half feet, and I was like, two and a half feet, that's insane. How are you guys doing out there? She's like, We are just trying to get by, like, we're just trying to move the snow and stuff like that. And I was looking at pictures on social media all day. I mean, sidewalks that are usually clear as day were like had snow that went up to your hips, and you're like, oh my gosh, this is this is crazy. What kind of apocalypse are we living in?

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, it's it's gonna be hard to keep up with it, though. I mean, when it snows two and a half feet, it snows quick and heavy. So it's virtually you have no opportunity to keep up with it.

SPEAKER_01:

No, but I do want to say, I do want to take a second to um appreciate our DPW workers um during this time. They are putting hours in. I know people in my community are working above and beyond to try and make sure that the roads are clear um as best as they can. So we see you, we appreciate you.

SPEAKER_03:

The men and women, you're doing a great job.

SPEAKER_01:

Definitely, we appreciate it. It's um something that I think that we take for granted, and then we're quick to be like, oh my gosh, get this done when it's when it's time to get down to business. But I think that we don't we don't take a second to really appreciate them and be like, you know, I know that during this time are are putting lots of hours in, and people that are plowing, you know.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Um, I know your brother. Yeah, do you know?

SPEAKER_03:

I'll let you know a little secret um before we get into everything else we're gonna talk about. I used to drive a snowplow. Did you know that?

SPEAKER_00:

So you you can you know the struggle.

SPEAKER_03:

I do. It is a struggle, and the men and women they go out, they work long hours. I mean, I can remember back in the day uh being on the road for almost 24 hours at a time, just if when it, you know, it was snowing and it there was no let up in sight, and you had to stay after it, and then you had to keep the main roads open. I mean, I did that for quite a while, as well as doing the radio thing. So don't ask me how I did it. I guess I was a whole lot younger, and you know, now I have to drink a whole lot of coffee to keep that up.

SPEAKER_01:

But you were probably drinking lots of coffee then, too. I mean, there's no way you you can get through without it.

SPEAKER_03:

You know, one thing about that job is so many people bitch about my streets not plowed. How come? Where are you? What's taking so long? You gotta take into consideration that these men and women, number one, the hours they're working, and number two, there's gonna be some streets that are a priority for emergency vehicles. Because you live on a street where maybe a few cars go down doesn't mean they're gonna hit that right away, right? Um, and but there is an advantage to living, uh, for example, in a in a town or a village where those streets all pretty much get done by the town and village. But when you go to the state level, whether it's here in New York or any other state, there's a lot of road to cover, and they can't be everywhere at once. So it's just you gotta be patient. Yep. Yes, yep. So do you have a lot of friends?

SPEAKER_01:

I that's a good question. Um, what do you consider a lot of friends? What's a good number?

SPEAKER_03:

You know, I was reading that the average person throughout a lifetime will have six friends, six real true friends. All right. And um I used to call like on Facebook, I have what 6,000 friends. It's like they're my friends. Are they really? Do I really know them? Or maybe they're just an acquaintance. So there's friends and there's acquaintances. But uh, and then the other day I was told that you're gonna have six friends throughout your lifetime. And those six friends will be the six that will carry your coffin because they're gonna stick with you throughout your life. You know what I mean? An acquaintance. So, what is an acquaintance? Is it you know, is that a friend? See, I always considered everybody a friend, but really think about that.

SPEAKER_01:

That's a good that's a good point to make, you know.

SPEAKER_03:

Is it?

SPEAKER_01:

I think it is because uh it kind of makes you I don't know, because you're taking a second to kind of think how you can execute yourself or present yourself, you know what I mean, or how much energy per se that you're putting into your your relationships, and then you have that other person that you have to kind of take into consideration. You know, there's there's two parts here, and there's the the what you're putting into it and understanding, you know, one thing that I um I heard that I think is very inspiring and kind of relates to this is that you can't find yourself in other people. You know what I mean? So, like if you were to approach something a certain way, you can't expect another person to react or um go that same route because they're not the same person as you. And I think that if you have a friend that can respect that, you know what I mean? That you know, we're not gonna see eye to eye in everything, but as long as we can compromise, we can grow together, and we can support each other, I think that that's benefiting. You know, I I firmly believe that friends should solely fill each other's cups. If you're feeling drained after hanging out with your friends, if you you know what I mean, if you've been friendly all night, that's a different story. But if you're like, you know, like wow, my social battery is like, whoo, I need a second, or you're like, no, I I actually feel better, and I confide in them to talk about things to kind of get that second view, and I don't I don't feel judged. I think that that's a friend. Now, an acquaintance, I think there isn't that much emotion attached to it. I mean, it's kind of give and take. I think it's more, dare I say, materialistic. Maybe, you know.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, I made it, I made a list. I I broke it down acquaintance. So an acquaintance here. No, I know, I know. And agree or disagree. I want to hear it. I want anybody if you're watching this, uh, feel free to comment as well. So an acquaintance, all right, here we go. It's someone you know, but not deeply.

SPEAKER_00:

That's kind of like what I said.

SPEAKER_03:

Yes, kind of, kind of, close, yeah, close. Get this interaction is usually situational. For example, work, gym, school, mutual friends with somebody. That's basically it. Uh, conversation stays surface level, like weather, work, uh, small talk. You know, we don't really go deep with it. Um, limited emotional investment. That's that's an important one. And you probably wouldn't rely on them in a tough moment. That's that those are like, for example, let me say this a co-worker you chat with in the break room, let's say you're in the conference room, or someone you see at a local event. Uh that's just that's an acquaintance. That's all that is. It's somebody you know, you're just hanging out having a just an easy conversation. Now, a friend, you want to hear my friend list?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, ready? Yeah, all right, all right. Let me know.

SPEAKER_03:

All right, here we go. So, my friend list, someone you trust and feel comfortable with. Okay, you spend time together by choice, not just circumstance.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, I love that by choice, not circumstance. Yeah, get it, you feel it? You feel it? All right, yes, I feel that.

SPEAKER_03:

All right, conversations can be personal or meaningful. Because we we open up to our closest friends about things you probably can't even talk to your mom or dad about. Think about it. You got a friend that you will open up with, and and they'll keep it a secret. Whatever they need to do, they don't. That's it, it doesn't go any further. Uh, there's emotional support, loyalty, and mutual effort. There you go. Uh, you'd likely call or text them when something important happens. That is a friend, and you're gonna get a response. An example, someone you'd invite over, you would vent to, as I mentioned, uh, maybe celebrate wins with, or ask for help. And here it is, simple way to remember it. I made a note of this too. See, I did my homework today, you know. Um, you thought I was on the air, I was doing some homework, yeah. Uh, but uh, simple way to remember it. I put an acquaintance, I know you a friend, I know you, and I care. There is what it's all about. So what you think of that?

SPEAKER_01:

I loved that. Yeah, that was pretty good.

SPEAKER_03:

So, you know, and I've learned a lot because it just uh some of the things I've been going through and people I've been talking to made me realize that uh not everybody's your friend. And I was like, no, they're my friends. No, are they really? No, they're not, they're an acquaintance, and I get it. You can be nice and have an acquaintance. I mean, you and I, I think we have a pretty good friendship now that we've gotten to know each other. I think that's that's meaningful and it's true, and it it's good. We care about each other, but then there's other people that you and I see every day. It's like, hey, how are you? It's good to see you. Well, you know what? They're an acquaintance, they're not really a friend.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, it's much more surface level, you know what I mean? Like you're not really trying to you and I had uh uh touched on this earlier. We were talking about how him and I think alike, and how like if somebody were to have a conversation, like normally you would you would have the conversation chronologically, right? Skip and I, the way that we we work, and I'm sure people see in the podcast is we like start talking about something and then our brains go to like three different other things, and then we come, we come back to to that thing that we were originally talking about. And even if those things that we're talking about might not correlate or agree with each other, it's the fact that we we're both human, we want to understand each other's perspectives and um try to understand where they're where each other's coming from.

SPEAKER_03:

No, exactly, exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

Which I think is sorry, no, no, no. I was just gonna say I think is um is critical because you have so much experience, there's so much knowledge that your brain holds, and I'm just this I don't know. This fresh new new perspective that's kind of like I don't know what about your balance of of both two, you know what I mean? Like there's moments where you're fresh in your hip, you know, you you love to work with AI. You work with AI sometimes, and I I also do that, but you know, I still hand write my notes.

SPEAKER_03:

Yes, yes, and and I love there's there's things that like I don't know, it doesn't need to always add up with the relationship we have and the difference between us that you would be the one like working with AI and having things typed out and this and that.

SPEAKER_01:

Instead, you're doing like a diary, the handwritten, yes.

SPEAKER_03:

I wrote in my writing everything else journal. I love that the skip happens journal.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, it is, and I was showing them earlier in the beginning of the book is is notes from past shows.

SPEAKER_03:

So oh my god, I love that.

SPEAKER_01:

I love that yes, I wanna I wanna be able to reflect on on who I am and what I'm talking about right now, and then be able to grow and and become a better version of me.

SPEAKER_03:

Exactly. Um, more about friends. Uh, you know, they know your kind I have a lot of notes here, and I love this. Uh I kind of broke it down even a little bit further that an acquaintance and a friend, a friend is like access to your inner world, an acquaintance just knows the facts about you. That's about it. All right, a friend knows your context, an acquaintance, uh, it's where you work and what you do and the surface preferences. That's pretty much what I mentioned just a few minutes ago. Um, but a friend can look at you and understand why or what you do and why you do it, they will know what stresses you out. So I mean, you know me by now. You know, you know when I'm not having one of those days, for example, when the the phones went the Verizon, right? What motivates you and what you're afraid of. I mean, that's a friend not knows all that, and uh, but there's also an emotional risk. Uh, friendship requires risk, acquaintance uh ship avoids it, they don't want the risk, right? You know what I mean? All that. So, yeah, that's just I just thought it was interesting as you know, you know, talking to somebody and just kind of finding out where I am in my life and finding out who are my friends and who are not my friends, and it was brought to my attention. Even got a little bit of an argument over it with somebody once saying, No, no, I know them, they're a friend, but aren't they really a friend? Right. Somebody at it was somebody at uh I was over at the ballpark for an event here a few weeks ago, and I mentioned to somebody that hey, I saw somebody that knows you, and then we were talking, and they're like, Well, how do you know that person? I went, They're a friend, and they're going, No, no, no, they're not a friend, they're just an acquaintance, they're just somebody you know, and so that you know, and I brought that up to a therapist and all that, and we we discussed it, and this is where I am, this is why I wanted to talk about it.

SPEAKER_01:

It's just it just made me really, really think and think deep about yeah, who's really my friend, Miss Ray's my friend, and I think yes, definitely, and I think that that's really relatable to a lot of people on on so many levels, you know what I mean? Where they they look at a relationship, whether it's a friendship, whether it's an acquaintanceship, is that a word? Or um even like uh like intimate relationships, you know, you reflect on those and you kind of think like what am I seeking from this person and why am I seeking it? And what is this person giving me? And and stuff like that. So I think the perspectives that you you put out were very interesting.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, I just you know, I think about what I do, and I've been doing it a long time, and I considered so many people friends, and but can I um and they're not friends, they're acquaintances. All right, go ahead. Shoot, I'm ready.

SPEAKER_01:

How um how has social media impacted that that like your interpretation of that? Because I think that with social media, I find myself subconsciously comparing myself to others or looking at other people and thinking, like, you know, we've talked about parasocial relationships where like people find an artist and they're like, I relate to this person. Um, but then you get on a more lower or smaller spectrum, and and you can have the ability to form these relationships. Do what do you think about the social media?

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, man, I did you know everything's friends, your friends, your friends, but yeah, everything's likes, everything's uh I um, you know, because of doing what I do, and um being who I am, not it doesn't matter, you know, I I don't look at it that way, but people want to people want to friend you for example on Facebook, and I got all and I usually accept them, you know, because that they may listen listen to the station that they like what I do on air and all that, so I've got friends, but you know what? I mean, it was brought to my attention a while ago. They're saying you got 6,000 friends. How many of those do you really know? As I mentioned minutes ago, too. So I mean, social media kind of gives you that false, but if you get in a certain state of mind, that can be really it can really affect you as well. You know, I mean, let's look at what social media has done to some of our youth and what it just you know, I hate to say it, a lot of them have, you know, they're no longer with us because of the way they were bullied online, somebody thought they were a friend, or they're not a friend, or a boyfriend, girlfriend, some crap like that. And it it just it's just terrible the way that happens. So, I mean, I love social media, but I also hate it because it yeah, this whole friend thing, and yeah, yeah, definitely should you be an acquaintance or should you be a friend? Right, would you acquaintance me?

SPEAKER_01:

Or yeah, I would that was an option, yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

You know, wouldn't that be exactly yeah? Yeah, exactly. Oh my god, that's hilarious. That's hilarious, crazy stuff. By the way, um, and let's let's move on here just a little bit. Uh, next subject is I see the skip happens logo in your background on your huge television. Yeah, what is that like that's like a uh 34 inch, 36?

SPEAKER_01:

She's a solid 35 inches.

SPEAKER_03:

I can no, you did, yeah. I know you're kind of filling the screen. I get it. That's cool. Uh-oh. Yeah, take my name off. Wait a minute. Well, that's not you should have put the one on with your picture.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I got the wrong one.

SPEAKER_03:

Not too late.

SPEAKER_01:

That's okay. Skip happened today. Skip happened.

SPEAKER_03:

Skip happened.

SPEAKER_01:

That's why we're why we're doing it on a Thursday. We're just it is, it is. The weather's been throwing us for a loop this day.

SPEAKER_03:

Definitely threw us off. Uh, but I did want to tease you about the television a little bit. Uh, I do have something else I want to talk about, then I'll then you can go on.

SPEAKER_01:

But uh so you mentioned earlier, I want to revert to what you said earlier about um we're gonna go back just a little bit sneezing at the restaurant. Yes, and I kind of I was thinking about that, and I my first thought when you said that was if something like that were to happen, would you be Mad at the person, or would you be mad at the business? You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03:

Like, well, the business should be. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01:

Would you be say you went to Chili's? Okay. Chili's, this is no hate. We're just you're just we're we're getting served the triple dipper, and somebody just sneezes all over it. Like all over it.

SPEAKER_03:

Hold on. You said the triple dipper. So you you go there.

SPEAKER_01:

I know what yes. I know what's good. All right, all right.

SPEAKER_03:

I just I just double checking, but that is good. I love the triple uh dipper. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes. So you get the triple dipper, and then somebody sneezes all over your mozz stick, and you like become enraged. Are you gonna become mad at the person, like the waitress, or are you mad at the oh my god, at the chilies at chilies?

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, well, let first of all, let me back it up a little bit. I I get that, but the the question, what we're talking about, is in the very beginning is uh one of the things we're gonna chat about tonight was if you saw someone cough or sneeze over your food while preparing it, would you still eat it? So that's what's led us to this conversation now uh about going to Chili's. And you know, I that that's a great question. Who would you be mad at? Would you be mad at the waiter or the waitress, or would you you know blame the establishment?

SPEAKER_01:

Well, first, well, the establishment needs to train the waiters and waitresses, so right, but that person should have common courtesy to be able to excuse themselves or turn the other way. And I don't know, I kind of see both sides.

SPEAKER_03:

Hmm. I do, yeah. I think there's two sides to that. Would I be upset? I would be, yeah, but then you know, would it depend on who it is? Let's say you're not at chilies, but what if it's a stranger versus someone you know? Does that make a difference?

SPEAKER_01:

That's me just speaking for myself. Other people have what if it's just like you know, if it's your own sneeze? What if you sneeze into your own food?

SPEAKER_03:

Well, I think that happens more often than not because I get it just thinking about it.

SPEAKER_01:

But but accidents happen.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, skip happens and it happens all the time. But think about that. If it's somebody you know, does that make a difference? Does it depend on where you are? You mentioned chilies. What if you're just uh home and uh your little sister comes over and she sneezes uh over your spaghetti?

SPEAKER_01:

I'm infuriated. I'm infuriated, it's over. The whole I've lost my appetite.

SPEAKER_03:

All right, okay, all right. Uh the family holiday meal, you know, you get everybody together, somebody's gonna have a cold.

SPEAKER_01:

I I it doesn't matter what kind of cough is a little bit different than a sneeze.

SPEAKER_03:

Maybe I oh my god, you took the words right out of my mouth. Go ahead. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01:

I I think a sneeze is much more um I'm trying to think of it's just more in more out there, you know. It's more aggressive.

SPEAKER_03:

But is it really? Have you heard some of these people cough and it comes from so deep and it sounds like they're hacking up a lung? Yeah, and then they continue about their business.

SPEAKER_01:

It's it's interesting.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, no, it is. Uh the you know, what what if uh well, I guess if they turned away and you still saw it, it's still the same.

SPEAKER_01:

Um can I draw a parallel to another um situation kind of similar to this, but it's music related? So let's look at um when artists say crazy stuff. Okay, okay, for example, Kanye West.

SPEAKER_03:

I don't know where this is going, but I'm ready.

SPEAKER_01:

That's okay. So Kanye West, right? My question is is do say you love Kanye. Are you gonna confide into cancel culture because he messed up, or are you willing to separate the art from the artist? And that's where I think that that can be drawn to the Chili's analogy, to the Chili's story, is because are you gonna look at that artist, the waitress, and blame them and look at them and say, I'm gonna cancel you, or are you gonna separate the art from the artist, the art and chili situation being chili? But can you look at the business and say, hey, like I'm fine with that? And then if you draw that to music, are you are you quick to follow that cancel culture, or are you one that's that's uh has the ability to separate art from artist?

SPEAKER_03:

I can separate it. You can separate it, yeah. Art, I mean, when you talk about artists, their art is their music, and a good example of that is um maybe I'm shifting gears here just a little bit, but uh do you remember the Dixie Chicks? Have you heard of the Dixie Chicks?

SPEAKER_01:

I have. I actually have a I don't mean that in a band.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, go ahead.

SPEAKER_01:

No, you're you're good. My mom um saw the Dixie Chicks and she gave me a Dixie Chicks C D that's on my desk at work. But yes, sorry.

SPEAKER_03:

Did it have goodbye Earl on it? You'll have to look it up after.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm just actually there's a little backstory to this.

SPEAKER_03:

Earl needed to die, so yeah, yes, I'll leave it at that.

SPEAKER_01:

Um we're gonna have to check.

SPEAKER_03:

But see, the Dixie chicks, they were they were awesome in the way that uh they could sing, they could write, they did their thing, they put out great music. Then Natalie, the leader of the chicks, in a different country, got on stage and said something about our then president, bashed our country, whatever.

SPEAKER_01:

And this was in the early 2000s, yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

To kind of give people that might not know the Dixie Chicks.

SPEAKER_01:

I know they're a good group, but yep.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, but there was now the political, now there's a political side to it. And people were like, that's it, the Dixie Chicks are done. I'll never buy another CD, I'll never buy any more music that you know anything to do with the chicks, it's done, it's over. Um, it just they were banned from radio. It just, but they weren't really banned from radio. A lot of stations did that on their own. They banned them. But uh when I was working at another country station at that time, um, I took the stance as me. This was me, um, saying I don't agree with what they did, but I don't hold it against the music. I don't, I'm not gonna say uh, you know, their music sucks because of what they said. Their music is great, but I disagree with what they did, right? But I don't, you know, so I kind of stood that ground and saying you gotta separate the politics from the music. That's you know when it came to that. So, but maybe I've taken a right turn here. But still that uh, you know, that's how I felt about that. So yeah. Now I don't know what that has been.

SPEAKER_01:

It's just um um that's hilarious. What does it gotta do with food? Oh my gosh. I don't know, it could be different. Um, but what I was gonna say is I think that that kind of draws to um Kanye actually recently, this is some hot, hot news, everyone, some pop culture news. Kanye just um released an apology letter about what he said earlier um a few years ago that was politically related. And he he um I read a little bit of it, um, because I do sometimes listen to Kanye, despite what he's said. I separate the art from the artist. And he spoke really heavily on on mental health and how he he struggled and how he um you know had to overcome that and is trying to overcome that. And I think that that's that I think is really inspiring to be able to become vulnerable like that and admit when you might be wrong. And I'm not sure if the Dixie Chicks did that same thing, you know what I mean, where they they did apologize.

SPEAKER_03:

I d I could be entirely wrong, but I for some reason I don't recall that they ever did.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's okay. Some circumstances, some circumstances, you know, people change, they evolve, they grow, they they have different ideas over time, and they they reflect and they're like, you know, I didn't really agree with that, and then other people stay firm in what they believe. There's no right or wrong, people are allowed to stay firm and fierce in what they believe, and people are also allowed to to change and change their minds. So I don't think that there's a right or wrong in that.

SPEAKER_03:

No, I got you there. I got you there. Absolutely. Wow, interesting though. It's all interesting, and it all goes back to food. So I mean, we talked about that a few a little bit, but uh I guess I guess if somebody, let's back it up a little bit, that if somebody did, I mean, we got off in these subjects, but they're kind of parallel. You're right, you can kind of go either way with this, either side, which is which is cool. And but uh the we started it off with would you eat something if somebody sneezed or coughed over it uh while preparing it? So which I would assume you would not, regardless who it was if you saw it. But do you think that happens all the time, or do you think it happens more times than not? You don't know what goes on in the kitchen.

SPEAKER_01:

That's that's so true.

SPEAKER_03:

Do you ever think about that?

SPEAKER_01:

Have you ever worked in food service?

SPEAKER_03:

Can't answer with a question.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I've worked in food service, so I've learned to never ask questions. You just eat what you've eaten, and you just be happy that you got something in your belly. Would you eat it if you were really hungry?

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, go ahead.

SPEAKER_01:

If you see something wrong, something a little suspicious, then ask questions. But okay, you know, most of the time people people follow the rules.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. Would you eat it if uh you were really hungry and it was uh the last meal? Um last option? Not meal. Last option. No? Okay, you'd go hungry. You say that's it. I just I'll have a snack when I get home.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't know. I turn into marshall when I get hungry. So it's hard for me to sit here and be like, um, no, I wouldn't eat it when I know that I I probably if it was three days and I had no food, probably the girl's gonna do it.

SPEAKER_03:

She's gonna do it. What if it was uh really, really expensive and a once-in-a-lifetime meal? Hmm. See, I know, I know. I guess it would all depend on how it all went down.

SPEAKER_01:

So yeah. It would.

SPEAKER_03:

So there you go. Absolutely. 100%, 100%. And um, let's go to another page. Check this out. As you know, um, we're doing everything we can to promote skip happens. And you know, we have the uh the pod zone here, and I go and I get different things, mugs we hand out, people can purchase them. We've uh we're sending them out as well. And well, my new mugs came in. You may have seen them in my office, and I don't know if you've noticed how I spelled podcast. That is it actually little typo podcast. I love that podcast. They used to like Tia said today, they used to have like cow pod, but I've which was hilarious.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah, I had never heard of that, but apparently cow pods a thing.

SPEAKER_03:

Apparently, I think they came out pretty cool, and then I'm going, oh, these look really cool. Our new mugs are in, and then I see podcasts, and that's nobody's fault but my own, because I did not look at the uh at the graphic close enough to uh to say, Oh, I gotta fix that. Instead, I just said, Yep, looks good. Put you know, my credit card in there and paid for it, and here they are a week later with podcast. So now this is the skip happens podcast. Uh, it's a good play on words, though. I like that. Actually, I may uh yeah, we may just go with it.

SPEAKER_01:

We may keep that.

SPEAKER_03:

We will. We will make sure you get one too.

SPEAKER_01:

It's like uh it's like uh a Bob Ross mistake, you know. It's just a happy accident.

SPEAKER_03:

Bob Ross, love Bob Ross.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, yes, just a happy accident.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, is he still painting doing that stuff? I don't know. Or is oh my god, it's not huh?

SPEAKER_01:

I don't know. Let's see.

SPEAKER_03:

I know. Oh, yeah, there you go. He licked that baby up.

SPEAKER_01:

Uh yeah, so and he's gotta be up there in years as we uh oh my gosh, he passed away in 1995 from lymphoma.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, cancer sucks. Yeah, sucks, sucks. You know what?

SPEAKER_01:

I should have known that, but it's amazing that his legacy can live on. It does amazing that over 30 years later people are still making Bob Ross references. That's yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Zach was Zach was Bob Ross on Halloween. He hasn't Nancy Wig, and then Nancy was Bob Ross, and uh she went to work for the Syracuse Mets, and I think she dressed up as Bob Ross one day, which was awesome, it was amazing.

SPEAKER_01:

It was iconic. I loved it. I was like, I had to do a double take. I was like, ain't no way this is Nancy, but it it is. She's there behind the beard and the wig. She's under there.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. Skip happens, baby. That's what it's all about. It's the podcast. Yeah, it is. Anything else you'd like to uh to bring up? What do we uh um I know you had some stuff there in your journal? I do.

SPEAKER_01:

I had a lot of um just human-related stuff, just like um what you know, you would you mentioned friendships earlier, and one thing that I I did have was how humans are are always seeking validation. You know what I mean? Like we, that's something that I think everybody can relate to in any way that we all enjoy validation, whether we seek that, we don't need to use that word, but we all can say that you enjoy validation.

SPEAKER_03:

100%.

SPEAKER_01:

So I think that what's really cool is kind of talking about um like artists changing after they hit rock bottom, and how people will once they've hit a low point in their life or they hit a certain point in their life that they make that change that's necessary, and how when just how um when you say change, what do you mean? Like a personal change, like a I guess an outlook on life, looking at things a little bit different, yeah. Like your your perspective shifts, and I think that you can see that on so many different levels, whether it's it's rock bottom, you know, making drastic changes, um, or even on other levels, like people I think it can even be as simply as changing the way you dress, like just kind of feeling like you you have to change yourself or shift yourself and in that pressure of having to do that. And um another thing that I did have was when you feel pressure, and especially when it comes down to careers, how how do you deal with that pressure when you're working with the battle between making it, like just having to make it versus loving the art? You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03:

So well, loving the art, I mean, you gotta love the art. If you're gonna make it, you gotta have a passion and dedication for what you're doing, what you're putting out, whether or not it makes it. I I don't know, it'd be nice if it did, but does that really matter? If you're happy, if you love what you're putting out, you love what you're doing, why would that matter? Of course, I mean you want your bills paid and you want it things taken care of, and you want to make sure you want to make it, yes.

SPEAKER_01:

But if you love what you do, I think happiness can be open for interpretation because you, I mean, we all feel sadness, and I assure that you can count a handful of sad songs off the top of your head. So, why are these artists happy if if they're feeling sad? And I think that that's where that rock bottom comes into place. Like you have people dealing with real emotions, they're feeling like this pressure, they're feeling like they need to change, or they might even be struggling with how they're dealing with their relationships with friends versus acquaintances, and they're expressing that through their music and their art. And I just think that that can kind of be relatable to all of us.

SPEAKER_03:

I mean, just if an artist puts out a song that's really sad or it grabs you right in the heart, doesn't mean he's not happy. He's writing about real life, he's singing about real life, and he's singing about you know something that matters. And as we've mentioned in other podcasts, or I have, that if they can touch your heart, they've got you as a fan, you're gonna go and buy their music.

SPEAKER_01:

So they're even if that artist is singing sad songs, you think that there's still a happiness?

SPEAKER_03:

I think so. Yeah, yeah. Okay, there is. It's when you're singing the sad songs and nobody's buying your songs, and that that's yeah, it's not good.

SPEAKER_02:

That stinks, yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

But uh, yeah, I mean there's artists. I mean, if you listen to country music, I know you're not exactly, and no disrespect meant meant, but you know, the country station is not your station. I get that, and I totally I I know it never used to be mine till years ago, and I was forced to go do it now. I love it. But uh, and I think it would happen to you too if you had that opportunity. But uh, country music, that's what it's all about, it's all about life. I mean, yeah, there's a lot of upbeat songs, a lot of fun songs, but you know what?

SPEAKER_01:

There's a lot of heartbreak, there's a lot of drinking, and there's a lot of you know, yeah, a lot of that going on, and uh I mean, one of like the top country songs right now is Morgan Wallins, I got better. And every time I listen to that, it it tears on my heart strings. It really, really does. And I'm like, is he feeling happy or is he feeling like it's hard to distinguish how he really feels when you know it's just it's very interesting, yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

No, no doubt, no doubt. It is, and Morgan Wallen, it um, you know, he's been through a lot, he's been through alcohol, he you know, drugs early on. He he um he's done so much though, and apparently he's got himself back on the right track now.

SPEAKER_01:

But this happened before he got himself back on the right track and he derailed, so it you know, but but then he pulled himself together and threw a chip. And he himself, he and that may have been rock bottom from him, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03:

And he may have been, he may have top, but other than that, you know.

SPEAKER_01:

I think. In circumstances like that, when people make mistakes, you you have two options. You can either let the guilt consume you and the the you know you're just your that struggle consume you.

SPEAKER_02:

Right, right.

SPEAKER_01:

Or you can you can make a change and you can you can choose, you know, I'm gonna go to rehab, I'm gonna go to therapy, I'm gonna make some new friends, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do that, and I'm gonna take care of my mental and it's gonna help me both personally, professionally.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, yeah. No, I was I I was gonna circle back, and I don't know if I wanted to do that right now, but um because go right ahead. No, well, friends and acquaintances, and we all have our circles. How big is your circle? How big is your circle? Do you and do you just let anybody into your circle? You don't.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't I don't let anybody be in because it's I don't know, it's I'm very protective I um of who I am and like who I am right now, and it's taken a lot of work to get here and to to have um yeah, to have everything that I have. So I I choose to I select people um very carefully. But we've talked about this before how in my friendships, they're my best friend, her and I could not be more polar opposites, like completely opposite, the way that we think, the way that we act, the way that we dress, like everything's really pretty opposite. But there's something about that yin and yang relationship that just works. Like it, I don't know how to describe it. Like we don't, and we appreciate that about each other. We talk about how, you know, thank you, thank you for thinking differently than I do. Thank you for doing, you know, having this different perspective. And her and I are are drastically different politically, religiously, like uh in all spectrums. But I think that there's something that's so that's gonna teach both of us something that we need to know. Do you know what I mean? Because I don't know, I just feel like there's a reason for that.

SPEAKER_03:

It is opposites attract, even you know, even with relationships. I mean, not just friends, I don't know about acquaintances, but I know with friends, opposites opposites will attract and relationships. I mean, we're opposite here. I'm a slob, she's a neat freak. Yeah, you've you've seen my podzo. I get it, I get it. I know, but it's actually pretty neat right now, but still, no, no, that's what it's all about.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah, it's about that complimenting each other, and it is my circle. Doesn't I'm more of a quality over quantity type of person. So I would rather have a friend that's gonna benefit me in, like I said, more quality than than having quantity. Like I don't care about having 20 friends, I'd rather have five solid friends than 20 friends that that wouldn't be there.

SPEAKER_03:

See, I I agree with you, but I never really thought that way. I I was always the type of guy that wanted to make everybody happy and had the more friends, the happier I would be. But here we go. We go back to what we were talking about minutes ago. Uh, are they really friends? No, they're acquaintances. There is a difference, and I learned I've learned that. I've learned that recently that there is a difference.

SPEAKER_01:

And you and I were also kind of talking about this, and this stems from personal, you know, like like why do you do that? Why do you feel the need to please people? Because I do the same thing where I would I'll do whatever I gotta do to make sure that there's no conflict, no confrontation, you know, and then when I reflect on that, I'm kind of like, well, I got the short end of the straw, and I'm not very happy about that.

SPEAKER_03:

But then you're like, Well, what did I do to to change that to stand out and you know then you start doing that, then you start justifying why you are the way you are, right? I mean, if doesn't that happen? Or am I?

SPEAKER_01:

I think that's that's a good point. I don't think that there's we all want validation. I like the word validation better. I think that there's nothing wrong in validating yourself. I don't like the word justifying. Um, I think it it to me equates proving, like you gotta prove, you gotta prove, prove, prove. And I don't know why somebody would need to do that in a personal relationship. I mean, what are we proven? Right, exactly. What do we feel?

SPEAKER_03:

But you feel you have to do that. I know, I know.

SPEAKER_01:

But I think that that's also because people are very competitive. I um I feel like people want to um have the best, and I I don't blame them. I mean, I I I want the best, but there's there's very little compromise when it comes to that.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow, or or yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow, great conversation today. I love this. I love this. And we went deep. We went deep about friends and acquaintances, and we talked about uh, you know, uh, would you eat food if you saw somebody sneeze or cough over it? You're at a restaurant, you're at uh well, I know you mentioned chilies, but that wasn't meant to be like it's nothing like that, but it's just I know you go. You get the triple dipper, yes. You know, nothing better than getting the uh the chips at uh you get the that too.

SPEAKER_01:

They got delicious chips, chips and salsa. I also love their their guacamoleon cheese. So we love chilies. This chilies, like I said, chilies was just the example, but no, no, no, I get it.

SPEAKER_03:

We go we go actually go there quite often. So yeah, it's just yeah, we can talk, yeah, we can talk about that next time. But uh what a great conversation is. You know, we chatted about uh you know relationships, friends, and acquaintances, and uh you can go back and watch it. If you do watch this, leave us a comment that you're you're looking at it afterwards. Also, we talked about, as I mentioned a moment ago, about coughing and sneezing over your food while somebody's making it, uh, and are you still eating it? I just thought that was like, well, think about it, it happens. It does happen.

SPEAKER_01:

Accidents happen, and and that's okay. It's okay.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, skip happens, everybody.

SPEAKER_01:

And it doesn't the real question is is if somebody did sneeze in your food, would you want to know or would you not want to know? That's like what would make you feel better? Would knowing that somebody sneezed, or if you just ate it and then found out, like, hey, someone sneezed in your food.

SPEAKER_03:

That's a very good thing. It's all in your stomach. I can't answer that. But I want if you're watching this, I want you to put in the comments whether you're watching it now or you're watching it down the road. There it is. That's the question. Let us know too, and we'll talk about it next time. We'll even give you a shout out next time, right here on Skip Happens. It's Miss Ray. Of course, my name is Skip Clark, and uh, of course, Skip Happens podcast from the hang on, from the PUD zone for the PUD pub cast. PUD. I call it a pub, but it's PUD with a D. I screwed that up. I don't know. I definitely messed that up. Thanks for watching, everybody, and uh what a great night. And uh, Miss Ray is right there from her home studio and her 34-inch television in the back. Um, but it's all good.

SPEAKER_01:

Don't worry, it's the big screen.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, you know what? We're gonna fix that for you. Yeah, Skip Happens is gonna make sure you get a bigger screen. So, all right. Thanks for watching, everybody. You good?

SPEAKER_01:

You good? Yes, we're good.

SPEAKER_03:

I'm good. All right, we love you, we love you, and uh thanks for watching Skip Happens YouTube. Subscribe and uh we'll see you next week, too, right here. Skip happens.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, see everyone next week. So long.

Head Shot

Skip Clark

Host